aWAKEning

Last night, I went to Mike H.'s wake. I didnt know him too well, he was part of my social circle though, and I'd hung out with him and his girlfriend Shelly a few times at some of the Burner events. He was young, maybe mid 40's? Pretty cool guy from what I knew of him. One of his friends decided to hold a wake/homage to Mike at her house last night, so Dustin and I caravaned over there. It was a really nice turnout, I'd say maybe 20+ people were there, a bunch of drummers and a lot of fire dancers. They put on a really nice show. On the way over there, Dave Matthews "Eat, Drink and Be Merry" came on the radio. They'd been playing a lot of DMB on the radio lately which I thought was kinda odd, but this time, I actually listened to the words. "Eat, Drink and Be Merry, for tomorrow we die." I turned it up really loud in the car, and thought it so appropriate for the moment. It got me thinking. I'm sure Mike didn't know he was going to pass on. AgniTara told me that he didn't look to well the last time she saw him, but attributed it to an amonia, or maybe the flu.
No one ever knows when they are about to die. Sure, if you're 89 years old, you have a pretty good clue, you might not outlive the decade, but even then, some people live to be over 100.
There are so many things that I have not done in my lifetime of 30 years so far. But, I've also done a hell of a lot of things that most people haven't. Money is a good thing, it helps shelter and feed and clothe, but that's not the final destination, is it? I guess for some people it is a severe driving factor. I dont want to die penniless either. Shaun is all about the money. IRA's, 401(k)'s, saving accounts. That is awesome that he has all those things at 23, and is planning his future. Not to be overly dramatic, but what if he dies at 24? Then what? He could have used that money to go skiing, spend and extra $20 on a nice bottle of wine, whatever.
See, I'm different. I have money, I use it. Not always wisely. I dropped $30 at Walgreens today on moisturizer. (I'm vain. I have wrinkles. Oh yes, dont tell me you can't see them! Liar!) I also have 9+ photo albums of amazing memories. Trips with friends, dinners, cute clothes that hang in my closet with the tags on them or maybe I've worn them once, that I bought for one particular night, things like that. I can't take that with me when I pass on. You can't take a IRA with you either, however it would be less of a burden on one's family if there was extra money to take care of funeral bills. What happens to really poor people when they die? They still have to be buried. Cant just pop them in a bag and toss 'em out to sea or dig a ditch in a backyard. There's got to be a law against that, I'm sure. :)
When I die, I dont care how my body is disposed of. I guess i would prefer being creamated, (makeing sure it's ALL MY ASHES in the can and not a mixture....eeewwww....saw that on 60 minutes once. Gross) anyway, being creamated and sprinkled over the ocean. Somewhere over L.A. probably, but any beach will do. NOT A FUCKING LAKE! Then, I want EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE to throw a huge fucking 2 day party in CELEBRATION of my life. I want all you guys to be sitting around a campfire drunk off your asses trading hilarious Andrea stories. Crying, laughing, bonding, making new friends from my old ones. I want the PSP'ers, alumni, LA club friends, Midwest Burners, and anyone in my inbox or on MySpace to know. Cuz I would feel really bad if there was a good friend out there that had no idea I"ve passed and just simply thought I never email/call them. I wonder how one goes about making a list of friends. hmmm....weird thought.

Well, as Dave says, I'm gonna Eat, Drink and Be very fucking Merry. Becuase tomorrow, I might die. I'll die broke, but hey, as long as it was worth it.